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2. That actuality said, it wouldn't annihilate you to mix things up every already in a while. Pinstripe shirts are good. Windowpane, too.
3. Dejected gingham. Trust us.
4. The abutting a man should anytime appear to affecting denim shorts is allowance a woman out of them.
5. There is a name for men who can cull off cutting sports jerseys. They're alleged able athletes.
6. "I'm on vacation" has never been a acceptable alibi for anything, including accomplishing anatomy shots, blank intelligence warnings about accessible agitator attacks, and cutting whatever you abuse able-bodied please.
7. A rugby shirt is the best adult affair a man can wear.
8. The 1950s and '60s were the aerial credibility of casual. Everything afore and afterwards was hit-or-miss.
9. Fitted is good. Snug is dicey. Tight is aloof wrong.
10. Hemp clothes are great. If you appetite to smoke them.
11. Biscuit pants will attending and feel their best about two weeks afore disintegrating.
12. The man who imparts opinions via T-shirt has neither the intelligence to anatomy a cogent assessment nor the acceptable faculty to accumulate it to himself.
13. Small holes in jeans? Affectionate of cool. Small holes in sweaters? Pathetic.
14. Justin Timberlake doesn't attending absolutely as acceptable as he thinks he does.
15. When purchasing jeans, leave the acid, stone, and added bogus washes to the acceptable bodies of Eastern Europe. The best way to breach in a brace of jeans is to abrasion them as generally as you can.
16. The shinier the flash or the pointier the point, the beneath accidental the shoe.
17. A alert acrylic or grass stain conveys a faculty of busy comfort. The aforementioned cannot be said for stains from food, dirt, wine, or actual fluids. That's aloof gross.
18. Denim is the centermost of the accidental universe. And some things attending bigger with it than others. A quick primer:
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All the Time: Affection accepted or T-shirt, amber loafers, navy-blue blazer, cashmere sweater.
Most of the Time: Crewneck sweatshirt, atramentous loafers, tweed jacket, affection turtleneck, white sneakers.
Only Sometimes: Hooded sweatshirt, high-top sneakers, sports jersey.
Only Under Duress: Waistcoat, cottony shirt, flip-flops, necktie.
Only Under Penalty of Death: Cufflinks, suspenders, opera cape.
19. Everything looks bigger with age. Except for white T-shirts. Those attending best new.
20. The Professor was the best-dressed man on Gilligan's Island, followed by Gilligan, Thurston Howell III, and the Skipper. Oh, and for what it's worth, Ginger. By God, Ginger.
21. There is annihilation so amiss with one's actualization that can't be improved, about slightly, by tucking in one's shirt and continuing up straight.
22. Consistently tuck: polo and dress shirts that adhere beneath your hip. Never tuck: sweaters and turtlenecks. Everything abroad is negotiable.
23. Articles of accouterment that you can dress up: polo shirts, biscuit shorts, dejected jeans, white sneakers, and, for Texans, cowboy hats and boots.
24. Articles that you can never dress up: sports jerseys, clue pants, wifebeaters, Birkenstocks, and flip-flops.
25. The alone ribbed items a man should abrasion are socks and condoms, and he best not abash the two.
26. A $40 brace of jeans can fit you aloof as able-bodied and attending aloof as acceptable as a $200 pair. They'll aloof booty a accomplished lot best for you to find.
27. Affection is the accepted accent of accidental clothing. Abrasion it anywhere and you'll fit appropriate in.
28. Sweatpants are for ailing days, couch surfing, and ablaze exercise. For annihilation else, bandy on a brace of jeans and get on with it.
29. Athletes affect the best sneakers.
30. Velour: no.
31. Never abrasion added than two denim items at a time. Scratch that: Never abrasion added than one denim account at a time, and accomplish abiding it's not a vest.
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32. Michael Bastian. Tim Hamilton. Adam Kimmel. Learn these names, for they are the approaching of American men's wear.
33. To our knowledge, catchbasin drivers never wore catchbasin tops. If they did, we ability like them better.
34. Biscuit is a color. Chinos are a brace of pants. Know the aberration but feel chargeless to use the agreement interchangeably.
35. Any man who plays acquaintance sports while cutting a watch he ethics — formal, sport, or diving — deserves absolutely what's advancing to him.
36. Leather watch straps.
37. The added big-ticket a restaurant's entrées, the beneath adequate you will feel in jeans. Unless, of course, you could buy the restaurant, in which case you can get abroad with annihilation you want.
38. Tennis and baseball are the best affecting sports on American style. Discuss.
Tennis: Lacoste polo shirts, Rod Laver and Stan Smith sneakers, tennis sweaters
Baseball: Brimmed caps, three-quarter-length shirt sleeves, flip-up sunglasses
Basketball: High-top sneakers, cobweb shorts
Football: XXXL everything
Boxing: Boxer shorts
39. No one you assignment with should anytime see your toes or your nipples. Amuse dress accordingly.
40. Abolish the assumption buttons from your store-bought action covering and alter them with buttons from a adorned golf club. It will abrade the hell out of the club's (real) members.
41. The button fly is:a) complete bullshit.b) the latest action in the decades-old war amid the complete attachment and button industries.c) a way to abstain disturbing up your johnson.d) all of the above.
(Answer: c)
42. Animals accomplish the best logos.
43. For adviser jackets, brown; for biker jackets, black. Deviate at your own peril.
44. Dress not like Kanye West. That goes for you, too, Kanye.
45. Afore you buy a cashmere sweater, blow the bolt and again rub your fingers together. If it imparts any balance or feels slippery, that's a abiding assurance of bad or alike affected cashmere. That and the forty-nine-dollar amount tag.
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46. There's a 74 percent adventitious that a man who isn't cutting socks isn't cutting underwear, either. Both endeavors allure the aforementioned affectionate of man.
47. Don't borrow any clothes from that man.
48. The best jeans accept bristles pockets. The best khakis accept four. Annihilation added or beneath and you're allurement for trouble. Oh, and 1998 called: It wants its burden pants back.
49. Unless you're wading into baptize or clay for a catalog, there's never a appropriate time to cycle up your pants.
50. Unless he's a chef, a gardener, or a blithe fat man from Holland, no one should anytime abrasion clogs in his circadian life. Aforementioned goes for Crocs.
51. Speaking of: We're not abiding what Americans did to deserve Crocs, but whatever it was, we're sorry. We're really, absolutely sorry.
52. If you see the words "Barbecue," "Come as you are," "Bring the kids," or "BYO" on an invitation, dress casually. When in doubt, accompany a navy-blue blazer.
53. Or a cardigan. A cardigan works, too.
54. The greater the cardinal of assertion credibility on an invitation, the added accidental you can dress.
55. Unless he's headed to a black-tie wedding, a man consistently has options.
56. Alike accidental appearance demands acceptable shoes. But not all shoes are appropriately casual.
57. Unless you're cutting a blazer, there's no amiss time to cycle up your sleeves. How aerial you accept to cycle them says a lot about you.
58. The solid dejected accepted shirt is the Jay Leno of American style.
59. There are worse things in the apple than actuality accepted as the guy who consistently wears a dejected button-down. Like actuality accepted as the guy who looks like he aloof formed out of bed or the guy who consistently smells a little funny. If you're activity to achieve on a look, get it right.
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60. The baseball cap is America's greatest addition to headwear. Runner-up: the cowboy hat.
61. Berets: no. Not in Paris, France, and abnormally not in Paris, Texas.
62. The overlap amid alive accouterment and accidental affair accoutrements should be kept to an complete minimum. Leave the neon shirts and pants for the links, the white tennis shorts to the courts, and the swimsuit at the pool.
63. There's no abuse in absolution yourself go, so continued as you're never added than an hour abroad from affairs yourself together.
64. A awning knocks ten years off your age and twenty credibility off your IQ.
65. Sunglasses don't accord on top of your head, bankrupt into the close of your shirt, or blind about your close by some nylon cord. If you accept to abolish them, authority them or put them on a table.
66. A man of appearance never discusses the amount of his clothing, alike if that fourteen-dollar sweater was a complete steal.
67. We're all for comfort. Aloof accomplish abiding the abuse affair fits.
68. If you're on the beneath side, vertical pinstripes advice amplitude out your legs.
69. There's not a accomplished lot of allowance for irony or apery in style. The best-dressed men consistently dress like themselves.
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