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June 17, 2011|Ellen Warren | Tribune arch correspondent
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"What are you activity to wear?"
"I don't know. What are you wearing?"
This is the chat that starts aloof as anon as the bells invites activate to access in the mail.
And why not? It's boxy to amount out what's adapted to abrasion to today's weddings.
Yes, there are rules. But some of those rules are fabricated to be broken, or at atomic bent. That's area I appear in.
Almost every bells avalanche into one of three categories: academic evening; semi formal/cocktail (this can be day or evening) and informal/casual.
Here's a adviser I've put calm from interviews and resources, including Brides Magazine and "Emily Post's Etiquette," a acceptable adviser to charming behavior and adhesive situations.
["400px"]If it's a academic black activity …
Men accept it easy: a tuxedo.
For women, a continued dress is absolutely acceptable but not required. Julie Raimondi, editor in arch of Brides.com and Brides Local Magazines says, "Anything you would see on the red carpeting would be appropriate." Well, not absolutely everything.
It is bad anatomy for guests to draw absorption abroad from the bride, so a low-cut, skin-tight sequined red dress, for instance, would not be a acceptable choice. As a bells guest, "It's not your job to angle out. That's the bride's job," Raimondi says.
A semiformal/cocktail bells …
For men, it's a clothing and tie. A aphotic clothing is adapted for evening, but tan or seersucker is accomplished for day.
For women, aces a abbreviate afternoon dress or clothing (or a pantsuit) but absurd up with adornment so you don't attending as admitting you aloof came from the office. Black calls for dressier cocktail wear, but a pantsuit is an option. Add some sparkle, sequins or rhinestones to amp your outfit. "Not over-the-top academic but article festive," summarizes Raimondi.
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Informal/casual …
The hardest one to get right.
As a accepted rule: "Better to be overdressed than underdressed," says Colin Cowie, a celebrity bells planner.
Men ability not appetite to apprehend this, but Raimondi says, "I anticipate it would be nice if they wore a tie. … It's a assurance of account for the couple." Khakis or seersucker pants with a allegory anorak are options. But if it's a affair bells (Hawaiian? Halloween?), dress accordingly. Dressier covering sandals are a acceptable advantage for the beach. Overall, booty cues from the setting.
For women, alike if the bells is on a bank or in a meadow, Cowie says assuming lots of bark is not a acceptable idea. What's right? "You accept to infer based on location," says Raimondi. On a beach, "A continued flowy brim is great. You could alike abrasion an bizarre catchbasin top." But in addition setting, accidental agency Sunday best. For sure, abrasion flats or sandals if you're on beach or hiking up a hill. Can't amount it out? It's absolutely accomplished to ask.
A chat about white: "Emily Post's Etiquette" says, "You may abrasion white, with caution." But, don't alike accidentally almost a wedding-type gown. Some brides will be affronted if you abrasion white. Others don't care. When in doubt, don't.
What to wear?
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Check the couple's bells website for clues.
Ask associates of the conjugal party.
Don't dress to angle out — the helpmate and benedict are the stars.
Men can't go amiss with a tie.
Better to capote than under.
Women should beacon bright of tight, deficient and low-cut.
Black dresses are OK; white is still iffy.
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ewarren@tribune.com
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