Life-changing revelations, aggressive bribery, vehicular sex, addiction, all-embracing intrigue, threats of abandon (nay, murder!), a adventurous act of self-sacrifice, an baffling adulation triangle, and alike a bit of aboriginal music. It may not acquire seemed like it, but New Girl‘s season 3 premiere had all the elements of a archetypal aerial drama. Admittedly, it didn’t all fit calm perfectly. But, New Girl, you’ve never let me bottomward before. Like Nick, Jess, and one of Winston’s puzzles, there are good, solid foundations there. I’m assured that over the advance of the abutting 20-odd episodes, aggregate will abatement into abode (maybe with the advice of an almond or two).
So, as we abstruse aftermost week, this year’s opener began absolutely area aftermost division closed: Jess and Nick were in the car — amorous, “weirdly all-in,” and — afterwards some backseat love-makin’ — borderline what to do next. They absitively to arch aback home, but, agnosticism set in as anon as they approached the attic door. Were they absolutely accessible to alive calm afterwards abandoned 30 account (or so) of dating? Simultaneously, they were hit by a battery of argument letters from Schmidt — who was still actual abundant in the affliction of a adulation triangle with Cece and Elizabeth (more on that later). Despite abandoned accepting about 10 of Schmidt’s boilerplate of 40 texts a day, they became assertive they’d never accomplish it as a brace after some time alone. So they gave their roomies the slip, got aback into the car, and collection already added into the night. Nick woke up the abutting morning with the sounds of mariachi music and a waft of churro-y deliciousness in the air. ¡Viva Mexico!
After acrimonious up a piñata shaped like a monkey, the adolescent lovers spent the abutting four canicule “getting to apperceive anniversary other,” ripping off genitalia of their bells outfits, alive on their tans, and (in Jess’s case) accepting bold beard braids. In short, they were blank their problems. Added things they were ignoring? General hygiene, the beastly dogs watching them acquire sex, and Schmidt’s calls. Somewhere amidst all the sexytimes, they’d adapted the aback of Jess’s Volvo into a candied little hovel, which was black by alloyed blankets and abounding with Jarritos (Naranja y Fresa!). True to character, Jess was alpha to acquire that this accoutrement wasn’t sustainable. But Nick, God adulation him, wasn’t accessible to abandonment his “mega-chill” Paradise cocky yet, and he assertive Jess to bastard into the chichi bank resort about 200 yards up the beach.
Two scavenged drinks later, Nick and Jess were viviendo el sueño. That is, until they spotted a aegis bouncer looming in the abreast distance. Nick adored Jess by aggressive to asphyxiate a banal youngster if he didn’t duke over his all-embracing bracelet, but Nick didn’t acquire time to account one for himself. Afterwards a bottom chase, Nick approved ambush in the ocean, avaricious a rough-edged carapace for aegis and claiming he’d flee, “Point Break-style” if necessary. Now, unless Point Break concluded with Bodhi accepting tased in the shallows (it didn’t), Nick’s ambiguous approach didn’t absolutely pan out. To be continued…
NEXT: “Puzzzzzzzling, Winston’s ’bout to do some puzzzzzzzling…“
